I was bored.

By Annabel. 21/01/08, 11:48 am

WARNING: The following post contains high levels of retardedness. The fragile are advised to keep their medical beeper things close at hand.

Today, after looking at this, my friend and I decided to make a parody KH fancharacter.
Yes we are mean.
No we don't care.

Introducing,
I was bored. Thewinnar053

HE IS VERAY URIGINUL!!!1!

NAME:
Asexking (formerly Seaking. F*** yeah!)

ELEMENT/S:
Awesome and l33t.

POWERS:
He can change peoples genders. However he cannot fully control this power yet. :c
That said he can kick pretty much anyone's butt regardless.

APPEARANCE:
~ Hair is combination of Zexion, Xaldin, Larxene and Axel's styles. It is Marluxia's colour.
~ She has Xigbar's eyepatch, except it is moar kawaii with a loveheart on it.
~ Tattoos ~~just like Axel's~~ completely different to Axel's under his eyes.
~ Xemnas' zebra pimp jacket transformed into a minidress to be moar kawaii. One half is black though because he is better than Xemnas.
~ Earrings like Luxord's.
~ He is seven foot two.
~ Kai and Annabel totally didn't use a Sailor Moon picture as a reference for him.

WEAPON:
~ Pikdum; a thing that looks like the illegitimate offspring of Vexen's shield and Saix's claymore, but which totally isn't.

KEYBLADES:
House Key
Can unlock the door to anyone's house. Once he has unlocked the house the owner will instantly change gender.

BMW Key
Can unlock any car but is particularly effective against BMWs. Once he has unlocked the car the owner will instantly change gender.

Girly Journal Key
Gives him the power to read anyone's journal. Once he does that he knows their secrets. Oh yeah and they change gender.

TRAGIC PAST OMG:
He was Sora's brother who was the real hero of Kingdom Hearts---sadly the writers cut him out of the game because they were too jealous of him. He was in love with Riku but Riku left him for his brother, so he killed himself and became a Nobody.
He joined Orgy XIII and everyone was jealous of him. Everyone was mean to poor Asexking. Except Xemnas, Xigbar, Xaldin, Luxord, Larxene, Marluxia and Lexaeus were all secretly in love with him. But when they proposed he turned them down.
After wallowing in his unrequited love for Zexion he hooked up with Vexen, but left him for Demyx. Him and Demyx got married. They had two kids. One was Longcat and the other one was Gary Norris (a sort of combination of Gary Oak and Chuck Norris).
I was bored. Happeefamilee054

Sadly Demyx left him for Roxas. Asexking went on the rebound with Axel. But Axel didn't really love him and he was mean to Longcat and Chuck Norris.
So Axel died for being a jerk and then Roxas died as well because we needed an excuse to get Demyx and Asexking back together.
So they did.
And they all lived happily ever after. :'D

NOTES:
~ Asexking is property of Annabel Keys and Kerri Sherlock. DO NOT STEEL HIM OR U WIL BE VERAY SORRY.
~ Anyone who ships Demyx with anyone other than Asexking is the devil. DEY R MENT 4 1 ANUTHA!
~ Asexking is more powerful than ALL the other Organization members put together times one hundred! All of his attacks do infinity damage.
~ When you fight Asexking in the game you have thirty seconds in which to beat him. If you fail you must watch ALL the cutscenes again. ALL OF THEM.
~ Asexking has a pet unicorn, but it's invisible.
~ Asexking PWNS!!!1!! lolololol!11!!Lol!!!
~ Asexking is not a Mary-Sue/Gary-Stu because he occassionally forgets how to play the piano.
~ oh yeah and I killed like infinity braincells when I made this. I hope yours are dead as well.

I am scared that I will be flamed now. Good day!

By Pyro. 21/01/08, 12:58 pm

-just died from laughter-

I LYK <3333 ASEXKING SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH, LOLOLOLOLOLOL.

I LYK HIS BMW KEYS!11!ONEELEVENTY!11

By Annabel. 21/01/08, 01:01 pm

xD yes, a lot of good, hard thought went into this one... he's very deep.
I just know you're jealous of my character creating skillz.

By Pyro. 21/01/08, 01:04 pm

To be honest? I actually am.

This is the most ROFLtastic parody!Sue (or, in his case, Stu) evar.

By Wishe. 21/01/08, 01:14 pm

O_O

...

XDDDDD

I laughed all the way through. Amazing character creation. xDDD

-still laughing-

By Annabel. 21/01/08, 01:25 pm

Pyro: isn't he just? xD Kai and I were like... laughing our butts off over YIM when we were making him.
I took a Stu test for him and he got 449. xDDD

Mika: I thought so, too! xD Thank you!
Asexking is an artistic masterpiece...

By bekah. 22/01/08, 06:20 am

Rofl xDDDDDDD
That's completely awesome.

cheers

By **Duckeh**. 22/01/08, 07:53 am

OMFG.
Annabel.
BABIES, MINE! YOURS! NOW!!!!
D;
ILY.
Do it again.

Ahem.
That was... awesome :]

By Kitten Slave. 22/01/08, 08:30 am

That was pretty amusing but...

Duckeh and Annabel producing babies... together...

Shocked

*inner pervert trying to escape*
*containment failing*

*Disconnect. Disconnect!!*

By **Duckeh**. 22/01/08, 09:28 am

>____________>
You heard nothing.
It's all in your head.

By Annabel. 22/01/08, 09:33 am

bekah: *highfive!*

Duckeh: YES! YOURS! MINE! NOW!
lol thanks. xDDD

Kitten: it actually is a pretty scary mental image... xDDD

By **Duckeh**. 22/01/08, 09:53 am

Kekee <3
That mental image for me, is just imagining our skit. ;]
Rahahahaha~ That's gonna be uber fun~ n.n

By SoraFangirl. 22/01/08, 12:38 pm

Lol. My mind exploded just thinking of his warped relationship with the KH members... ^^ Hahas. That's cute!! ^^

By Annabel. 22/01/08, 01:16 pm

(yes my wee duck. xD Yes it is.)

Damnit. I forgot to mention that Demyx broke up with Axel to be with him and ththat Vexen and Marly hooked up with his help... xDDD I have to edit it now...
lulz his relationship with them is like... so demented.

By **JVCA**. 22/01/08, 02:25 pm

THIS. IS. RAD. :DDDD

You totally WIN.

By Annabel. 22/01/08, 02:54 pm

It's good that he's been so well-received... otherwise I would have just known that you were all insanely jealous...

By bekah. 22/01/08, 03:12 pm

How do you know we aren't???
We're secretly plotting to like, steal him and claim him as our own 8D

By **JVCA**. 23/01/08, 03:34 am

Bekah is right, we're secretly plotting plageurism. Only, our one will be ever so slightly different -- like, Magenta coloured hair, and an eyepatch on his other eye. ETC. YOU'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO SUE US FOR IT! BWAHAHA!

By Pyro. 23/01/08, 03:47 am

Hey, guys, don't even bother trying to steal it... We'll blackmail him away from Belz.

-pulls out Paige's English Teacher- Oh Belz? You wouldn't want any harm to come to this lovely perv, would you Belz? xD

By Annabel. 23/01/08, 04:32 am

No, don't steal him! If you do, Kai and I will set him on you, and he'll read your diaries and turn you into men! And then you'll have Gary Norris and Longcat to deal with! D:<

By Pyro. 23/01/08, 04:39 am

What if we don't... Have diaries? Or our own houses? Or cars, for that matter?

AND I COULD LYK, SO TTLY BEET LONGCAT ND GARY IN A FITE. LOLOLOLOL

By Annabel. 23/01/08, 05:41 am

well then he'll just pwninate you with his radiating aura of awesome. Beat that. D:<
and no you couldn't. IT'S GARY FREAKING NORRIS!
blasphemy.

By Pyro. 23/01/08, 05:44 am

I'LL JUST USE MY SHIELD OF ANTI-AWESOME, THEN.

So what if he's Gary Norris? I can beat him with my team of ultimate fighter... -looks around- ... Damn.

By SoraFangirl. 23/01/08, 09:01 am

Uh... .... ...

*joins Pyro's team of ultimate fighter being armed with kunai knives and super-duper-deadly-pwning-glittery-gold-shruikens*

By **Duckeh**. 23/01/08, 01:25 pm

+Entices Sora onto Annabels side with sugary treats of d00m+
:]
I know you want them!

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